Depressed and manic! I haven’t been to bed in like 3 days as I haven’t been able to sleep as i have had a lot of energy and haven’t been able to contain but not enough energy to do any house work as i’m not doing that anymore because when i do i get downgraded and i’m tired of it. I was just told by someone that i’m a people pleaser and do almost any to make everyone happy well guess that shit is going to change as i’m going to start worrying about me and taking care of myself. I am currently sitting in the hospital in Urbana waiting on a crisis counselor to come and evaluate me so that i can possibly be admitted into the hospital for mental help with my bipolar. As this is the first time of me doing this on my own and by myself i am a little nervous and anxious. Every other time i was admitted it was because of self harm from intentional drug overdose and did not have a say and the originating hospital done it all. So here’s to me making a change for myself for once.
Well I can say that I was not able to get admitted into the hospital after speaking with the crisis counselor. They didn’t feel that I was a threat to myself or others and there was no need for me to be admitted into the hospital. Instead they referred me to a psychiatrist but am on a waitlist to be seen there so I have to continue with the medications that I am currently on along with the current dosage that I am taking. So in a way it was a waste of time for me to make a trip to Champaign, but I got to see some parts of Champaign that I haven’t got to explore yet.