Well yesterday I was able to attend Champaign-Urbana’s pride celebration and a couple LGBT panels, which one was sponsorored by Equality Illinois. The panel was very insightful into what they do for us and how they lobby to get policy and laws changed and created so that we don’t have to have any fear. After attending the panels I was able to attend and watch the Pride Parade. One of the things that I learned and didn’t know about was the panic defense against gays. Where someone can potentially getting a lessor sentence or lessor charge by claiming that they were provoked by a gay/lesbian.
There was so many entries in the pride parade. One of the amazing things I saw in the parade and didn’t know they supported LGBT community was Wal-Mart & Sam’s Club as they had a float in the parade. I always thought that they supported the community but never really saw it. The reason I point this out is because when I went to the Chicago Pride, which is a big national parade, Wal-Mart wasn’t in it.
Then I got to see the amazing T-Mobile car sitting in the lot and it was cool.
But I couldn’t have been able to attend this pride nor Chicago’s pride, without an amazing friend Dale. I know that if I’m having mental problems that I have someone else in my corner to talk to if I need it. So thanks Dale for the amazing opportunities you have shown me and continue to do so.
Well this week is National Suicide Prevention week and World Day of Suicide Prevention.
I can say that we need better resources in our communities to help with this epidemic. I don’t get any help except for my primary care provider as there aren’t resources unless I travel an hour away from home and to get the resources your on a 3 month waiting list and sometimes even longer than that. I am no stranger to Suicide as I have attempted it three times and need the help. I also know of others that have attempted it and need the help. We just can’t access the help that is needed as it isn’t here. We need to come together nationally, as a state, and as a world to help combat this epidemic. In Illinois alone the Suicide rates have went up 11% in the past year. At the national level our members of congress of all parties needs to come together and create a bipartisan plan to help with this.
There are literally thousands of people in prison and jails that don’t need locked up all because they can get the resources they need (mental health). Do you know the cost of that being locked just to get the resources needed. It’s around $31000 per inmate. Outside it is much cheaper than that. We would all come together we could combat this and eradicate it.
So here’s to Suicide Prevention Week and World Day of Suicide.
Us victims hope for a better day everyday.
Well I can say that this was an experience of my lifetime. I couldn’t have asked for a better evening with two amazing friends. I was able to see Boy George & and the Culture Club, B52s, and The Thompson Twins- Tom Bailey.
What made it even better was having the thunderstorms and getting soaked from it all as we didn’t bring any umbrellas or ponchos and he gift shop was sold out when we went in and then Charles goes back in and they bring out more ponchos and got us all a poncho so we could dry off.
While drying off we were able to get closer to the pavilion and see Boy George up close (atleast on the video screen). This evening had been one of a kind and the best.
I can say that this weekend is goin to be amazing. As I am going to Highland Park to Ravinia Festival to see Boy George, B-52s. I have never been to Ravinia Festival so this will be a first time for me and this makes it as my second concert in my life that I have ever been to.
Since joining Rainbow Cafe, I have been experiencing events that I have never gotten to experience in my life and am so grateful for the group and what they do for the LGBTQ community.
I call these people my family and my friends. I also want to thank a great friend Dale. If it wasn’t for him none of this would be possible for me to attend and for me to experience all these wonderful adventures.
September I can say is an eventful month besides having this amazing concert.
I can say that life is looking up and forward and am glad that I have the friends I do in my life because without them I don’t know where I would be.
My last post was pretty depressing but you know what I’m not depressed and it’s all thanks to my amazing friends at Rainbow Cafe.
So here’s until the concert and I will make sure to post pictures and all the happening during the event as well as upcoming events that are planned for the month of September.
With all of these events going on I’ve decided to start planning my birthday although it’s in the winter and there isn’t shit to do but I will figure something out as you only turn 30 once haha. I know whatever I plan that I will be inviting my amazing friends from Rainbow.
So here’s until my next post.
Much love to you all.
Well recently I was in Champaign at Carle Foundation Hospital with my Aunt as she was transferred there from another hospital for low sodium levels. We ended up spending a week there in the hospital getting her sodium levels back up into the normal ranges. While we were there, my aunt had a total of three doctors, a hospitalist, endocrinologist, and a nephrologist. They were doing lab work on her every four hours and checking her vitals and blood sugar every four hours as well. We finally got all her levels back to normal was able to be discharged from the hospital yesterday.
People say that I wasn’t in the hospital, but in reality I was, as I literally stayed there with her the whole time that she was admitted into the hospital. I can say that Carle Foundation Hospital in the best hospital around, by all our local hospitals that we have. While I was staying with my aunt in the hospital, I had people talking, saying that it shouldn’t be me staying with her and that it should be someone else. Well you know what it was my choice to go and stay with her, I was the one that stepped up before anyone could. Whenever my aunt is in the hospital, I am the one that stays with her and takes care of her. She is my world and she is the one that lights up my world. I don’t know what I would do without her as she means the world to me.
I just wish that people would stay out of my business and put their nose somewhere else where it don’t belong like they do.
So here’s to my stay in Champaign.
Well on April 2018, I was taken to my local hospital ED for trying to hang myself. I ended up staying in the ED until 9 am the following morning. After that, I got to be transferred to OSF Healthcare Heart of Mary Medical Center in Urbana.
I can say that they since OSF took over ownership, some things have changed and one of the biggest changes is the technology. The technology they use is some of the best. The downfall is that the computers/portable workstations are brand new and they keep freezing. I know they used a mixed environment for technology as that could be some of the problems that they have with their technology “upgrade”. Who knows what the backend server looks like, don’t know if they using just any backend server, or top tier, such as Apple Server, as they mix apple products.
After staying here for the three days that I did, I can officially say that I feel about 85-90% better than what I did before I got there. OSF Healthcare Heart of Mary Medical Center Behavioral Health Unit is simply the best and only hospital-based unit in the area.
OSF Healthcare provides superb healthcare and treats you just like your family. I don’t know what I would do if it wasn’t for OSF Healthcare. I greatly appreciate the services that they provide to our communities.
Next on my list, is getting my individual setup and started which, I will do on Monday.
Well today was a shitty ass day. I ended up trying to hang myself and just be done with life. My brother comes in the garage where I am at with the noose around my neck and getting ready to step off the chair I was standing on.
He wants to know what is wrong and accuses me of doing this for attention. Yea, suicide for attention? Makes sense don’t it. Well he made me call the crisis help line and I got no where with it and he even heard it. He then proceeded to make me call the hospital where I was last hospitalized to find out what to do. They told me to call an ambulance and go to my nearest hospital emergency room. I ended up doing as they said and got taken to the Hoopeston hospital.
Upon arriving to the hospital, I had to strip down to my boxers. My vitals were taken regularly and they advised that they have contacted crisis and that they should be there anytime but are coming from Champaign-Urbana area. Shift changed at 7 that night and crisis was actually called this time. Crisis didn’t show up until around 10 that night and then she fought her ass off to get me into a facility. She was trying every facility at her disposal when I told her specifically what facility I wanted to go to as I had been there before. I didn’t get to go to the facility until 7:30am when I got transferred to Champaign-Urbana to OSF Heart of Mary Medical Center.
I spent three days there in the facility for treatment of Bipolar Disorder Type 1.
*note this was written on the day and during my stay in the hospital.
Well, I can say that this week was week one of my suspension and then next week will be week two for my suspension out of my group counseling that I have. I don’t really understand the grounds for suspending me as my attendance record was supposed to be reset as it was after the first of the year and my other three absences were from 2017. According to the contract that I signed the set the rules for the group, was that you are allowed three (3) absences per year whether excused or unexcused. Also according to the contract that I signed stated that the attendance record gets reset every year. I can say that while on my suspension that I lot has happened so far. I have finally found my condo that I want in the Chicago area. I put an offer on it back in December and it was accepted and I am closing on it next week. Although I am closing on it next week, I will not be moving in for a little while, as I have also hired an interior designer to come in and spruce it all up. There are a couple of things that I want to be changed in the layout as I want an open concept floor plan and I have already gotten approval from my HOA for this process. The details that I want in it and the reconfiguration that I am having done I will not be able to move in it until sometime in March 2018 and at the latest April 2018.
I do have to say that with this suspension, that it has given me a lot more time to invest in myself and in my future. I believe that at this point in time this is the best option for me to start my life new and from a fresh beginning. I have been able to spend more time in Chicago exploring parts of the City that I have never gotten to experience in my life. There are so many different things in the Chicago area that I am have never seen nor done and can say that I am finally experiencing it all. I have gone to a couple of clubs this past week met a few people and made a couple friends.
All I know is that tonight was traumatic and full of drama from the moment I walked outside of group in Paxton. I ended up getting in my car and it is pitch black out as its 5:00pm at night and there are no lights in the parking lot. Once I got in my car and backed out of my parking spot I was in, someone came up tapping on my passenger side window and I thought it was someone in my group coming over before I left to see if they could bum a smoke or something, and when I went to roll down the window I hit the unlock button instead of the window button and he jumped in my car and told me to fucking drive. I got to the entrance/exit of the parking lot and there was a car blocking part of the driveway and I told him I couldn’t go anywhere because of the car being in my way and he told me to fucking go around. I did as I was told to do by him and then he asked me if I had a screwdriver in my car and I said nope even though in reality I probably did haha. As I was driving over the overpass by the car dealership so I could come into Paxton, he wanted to go to the dealership so that he could just steal a car from there, but then he changed his mind because the dealership was closed. Therefore he told me to go to Casey’s and wanted me to drive around the parking lot so that he could see if any of the vehicles had their keys in them so that he could steal one of them. I sure in the hell didn’t do that. I went straight to the front door of the Casey’s and went in and when I got out of my car, I made sure I had my keys and then made sure my car was all locked up. I went in and asked the cashier to please call 911 and I proceeded to tell her why when she asked me why, and an old lady came in the store all frantic as the guy that hi-jacked me had shoved her around and was in her car and took cash from her purse and was trying to steal her car but the idiot couldn’t because he couldn’t figure out how to start the car. There was a guy in the store that went out there and ended up tackling him to the ground once he got him out of the older lady’s vehicle. In the process of tackling him, he ended up bashing the suspects head into the concrete pole that is around the gas pumps. The guy had him pinned down until Paxton Police arrived, which was Sgt. Yates. Eventually Sgt. Yates paged for an ambulance to evaluate him and transport to the hospital for injuries sustained. While the EMTs were evaluating the suspect they dispatched another ambulance to the scene for the older lady as she has a heart condition just so that she can get checked out and nothing is wrong with her. Sgt. Yates ended up having me fill out a police report and it was Officer Stafford that brought me the report and directed me to fill it out to the best of my ability describing everything in detail as if they could see everything how it all turned out to be in my words. I got it all filled out and gave it to Officer Stafford and then I was released to leave and head home. This I can say was a scary sight from hell that I had to deal with.
Well this years theme for Milford Fun Days was Milford 500. I can say that the committee comes up with some pretty good themes for our annual town festival, but the activities that goes on just keeps going down hill it seems like in my personal opinion. It has gotten to where that I don’t even attend the festivities anymore because there isn’t anything interesting there like there used to be when I was a kid or even before then. The best thing about the weekend in my honest opinion is the themes they come up with.
I wish that they would bring some better entertainment back for all ages to enjoy such as amusement rides like they used to have. They used to have the Milford Jaycee’s that helped out with Fundays but they disbanded as well. Any of the festivities that they really care about is the good ole Beer Tent, as that is about the only thing that brings in money. They don’t the flea markets like they used to have or the food vendors either. I go to other festivities instead, such as the National Sweetcorn Festival in Hoopeston, Illinois, the Iroquois County Fair, or the Sheldon Fun Days as they all have much better entertainment for all ages to enjoy.